Emotions lift us up our of our dull, mundane routines and make us feel alive and significant. But we abhor the fear and anger and sadness that also attend love. Emotions also drop us into deep pits of desolation and despair and make us feel helpless and out of control.
As Freud remarked many years ago,
"We are never so vulnerable as when we love."
Emotion, we've discovered, is a sharp, smart force that organizes and elevates our lives. It is what transforms existence into experience. Emotion is what turns an object into a memento, an event into a happening, and a person into the love of your life. To feel for someone is the root of caring action.
Love relationships aren't supposed to be joy rides, they are also restorative and balancing meeting places where negative emotions are calmed and regulated. We are designed to deal with emotions in concert with another person--not by ourselves.
"Two hearts are better than one."
And, indeed they are!
Sue Johnson--Love Sense