Remaining a victim is ultimately a powerless position. It give those that hurt you all the power because your happiness is dependent on someone else's actions. Healthy forgiveness does not mean absolution; it means that you have the power to heal your wounds if you are willing. Jane Middelton-Maz, Lisa Tener, & Peaco Todd An old Chinese proverb talks about a man that was so disturbed by the sound of his footsteps and so bothered by his shadow that he tried to outrun both. No matter how fast he ran, his shadow effortlessly kept up with him and when he put one foot down there was always the sound of another step. He believed his failure was because he wasn't running fast enough, so he ran faster still. Finally, exhausted, he became very sick and finally died. He never realized that if he had just sat down and rested in the shade, his shadow would have disappeared and there would have been a quiet time without the disturbing sound of the footsteps. From Chuang Tzu Taoist Philospher (400 B.C.) |
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