As we look at our communication style, we sometimes wonder why we are not being seen and heard. We may realize it is time to understand what beliefs or thoughts may get in the way.
There are some aspects of our thinking that we may have taken from our early years, our caregivers, generational beliefs, education, experiences and how we manage life as adults.
We can challenge our old beliefs and thinking today to learn more about ourselves and how we communicate. As we become stuck, we are able to re-evaluate ourselves. We can seek a deeper listening style and provide more honest responses.
Take a look and evaluate yourself and your beliefs and how you communicate to others.
Ask yourself, "What am I doing that may interfere with my communication?"
Below you will find ten cognitive distortions we may not realize we use our daily communication with others. Identify what may be a habit, journal how you use the distortion in your communication today and how you can challenge these mal-adaptive thoughts and ways you can improve to communicate better.
List of Cognitive Distortions
All or Nothing Thinking
You look at things black and white categories/absolute.
Over generalization
You view a negative event as a never ending pattern.
Mental Filter
Dwelling on negatives and ignoring positives.
Discounting Positives
Insisting that accomplishments or positive qualities do not exist.
Jumping to conclusions
You assume people are responding negatively to you when there is no definite evidence.
Fortune Telling: You arbitrarily predict things will turn out badly.
Magnification or Minimization
You blow things way out of proportion or shrink their importance.
Emotional Reasoning
“I feel like an idiot so I must be one.” Or “I don’t feel like doing this so I will put it off.”
“Should Statements”
You criticize yourself or others with, “Shoulds. Ought to’s, Have to’s, are similar offenders.
Labeling
You identify with your shortcomings. Instead of saying “I made a mistake” you say, “I am a jerk.”
Personalization and Blame
You blame yourself for something you were not responsible for, or you blame other people and overlook ways that your behavior has contributed to the problem.
There are some aspects of our thinking that we may have taken from our early years, our caregivers, generational beliefs, education, experiences and how we manage life as adults.
We can challenge our old beliefs and thinking today to learn more about ourselves and how we communicate. As we become stuck, we are able to re-evaluate ourselves. We can seek a deeper listening style and provide more honest responses.
Take a look and evaluate yourself and your beliefs and how you communicate to others.
Ask yourself, "What am I doing that may interfere with my communication?"
Below you will find ten cognitive distortions we may not realize we use our daily communication with others. Identify what may be a habit, journal how you use the distortion in your communication today and how you can challenge these mal-adaptive thoughts and ways you can improve to communicate better.
List of Cognitive Distortions
All or Nothing Thinking
You look at things black and white categories/absolute.
Over generalization
You view a negative event as a never ending pattern.
Mental Filter
Dwelling on negatives and ignoring positives.
Discounting Positives
Insisting that accomplishments or positive qualities do not exist.
Jumping to conclusions
You assume people are responding negatively to you when there is no definite evidence.
Fortune Telling: You arbitrarily predict things will turn out badly.
Magnification or Minimization
You blow things way out of proportion or shrink their importance.
Emotional Reasoning
“I feel like an idiot so I must be one.” Or “I don’t feel like doing this so I will put it off.”
“Should Statements”
You criticize yourself or others with, “Shoulds. Ought to’s, Have to’s, are similar offenders.
Labeling
You identify with your shortcomings. Instead of saying “I made a mistake” you say, “I am a jerk.”
Personalization and Blame
You blame yourself for something you were not responsible for, or you blame other people and overlook ways that your behavior has contributed to the problem.
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