It is going to be hard to hear your true enduring voice, your vision,
buried underneath that noisy emotional racket.
Engineers call this the search for the signal in the noise.
Taming those emotions on your own,
now and then, is the key.
If you are limited to the vision that others' acceptance and love
are what you must have to be happy
and to calm those emotions
you may never move beyond that to find what satisfies you,
besides emotional support.
The question is, who are you?
If you do not get to know yourself and invest in building that self,
then there is nobody for you or others to become interested in getting to know.
An antidote for the emotional pain of feeling regularly deprived
and in need of more love and nourishment from the world
is to remember that you yourself have important gifts to give
and that you may be neglecting to give them
when over focused on feeling in need.
Make an inventory of what you have to offer
and see whether or not you are actually giving those things.
Some things like a sense of humor, cooking, the capacity
playing music, computer savvy, mechanical know-how, singing,
emotional support, stories, paintings, or anything
that might make the world a better place for others.
Taken from Leaving Lonliness
David Narang, Ph.d.