To have freedom, to be enough, is to recognize that we are human. To be human is to be imperfect. Making the long journey from, "What will people think?" to "I am enough," is quite a task. To take that journey means to own our own story. Develop self compassion, to create a truth about who we are, and build a wall against shame. To claim a truth about who we are and where we come from is to be honest and willing to give ourselves the same compassion as we would give a friend. To be gentler and kinder to ourselves and see ourselves with loving eyes, that we are not perfect, that we too, just as we see our friends, they are human, just as we are too. Give ourselves a break and appreciate the beauty of our cracks or imperfections. Self kindness is being warm and understanding towards ourselves when we suffer, fail or feel inadequate rather than ignoring our pain or beating ourselves with self criticism. Common humanity is recognizing that suffering and feelings of personal inadequacy are part of the shared human experience, which is something we ALL go through rather than something that happens to "me" alone. Take a balanced approach to negative emotions so that feelings are neither suppressed nor exaggerated. We cannot ignore our pain and feel compassionate towards it at the same time. Being mindful is that we are not over identifying with the negative thoughts that come our way, and get swept away with them. Being mindful is that we notice and allow ourselves to move through our feelings, not judge them or over exaggerate them. It is easy to get stuck in regret or shame or self criticism when a mistake is made. It is more difficult to provide honest self compassion and forgiveness, and remember our worthiness. The core belief that "we are enough" comes from when we live inside our story. We can either own our stories or stand outside of them--- denying our vulnerabilities and imperfections. Push away the thoughts of who we are 'supposed to be' honor ourselves with who we are, what we want and need and let go of needing other people's approval for our worthiness. Self approval is what is important. Perfectionism is exhausting, hustling is exhausting. Let go and be yourself. By being ourselves authentically and honoring ourselves is living authentic, colorful, and creative lives. |
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