the universe lights up.!
These instances leap from the parts of novels, burn in our brains when we watch them in movies --- and, of course, entrance us when they happen in our own precious relationships. Everything comes together; suddenly all the blocks roll away and there is an open, easy connection.
But how did we get there? If we don't know the path, how can we get there again?
Renewing your connection is something you and your partner do together. You both help each other keep your emotional balance and turn toward each other and tune in.
Its a dance. It is not something you can "fix" all by yourself from the outside by just saying the right words.
The goal is to understand the disconnection dance.
And please know that the first step in healing is not just recognizing stopping destructive behaviors and words. This is just the first step. The second step which is even harder, is actively working together to build a stronger and more durable emotional union. This requires dumping old emotions.
For example, that love operates in a fixed steady state, and that becoming more proactive, such as by being alert to the small bends in the fabric of emotional connection and knowing how to repair them.
The process of renewing bonds, we have learned, is continuous and inspiring, taking emotional connection to a whole new level. It makes us more emotionally accessible, responsive, and engaged, and thus it leads to deeper bonding and greater relationship stability and satisfaction.
It also transforms us as people. As we take risks and confront our vulnerabilities, our trust grows --- not just in our partners but also in ourselves.
Taken from Love Sense, Sue Johnson