hurt depression and stress and leads to greater feelings of
hope, peace, compassion and self confidence.
Practicing forgiveness leads to healthy relationships
as well as physical health.
It also influences our attitude
which opens the heart to
kindness, beauty, and love.
Know exactly how you feel about what happened
and be able to articulate what
about the situation is not OK.
Then, tell a trusted couple of people about your experience.
Make a commitment to yourself
to do what you have to do to feel better.
Forgiveness is for you
and
not for anyone else.
Forgiveness does not necessarily
mean reconciliation
with the person that hurt you,
or condoning of their action.
What you are after is
to find peace.
Forgiveness can be defined as the
“peace and understanding that come from blaming
that which has hurt you less,
taking the life experience less personally,
and changing your grievance story.”
Get the right perspective
on what is happening.
Recognize that your primary distress is coming from
the hurt feelings, thoughts and physical
upset you are suffering now,
two minutes or ten years ago,
Forgiveness helps to heal those hurt feelings.
At the moment you feel upset
practice a simple stress management technique
to soothe your body’s
flight or fight response.
Give up expecting things from other people,
or your life,
that they do not choose to give you.
Recognize the “unenforceable rules”
you have for your health or
how you or other people must behave.
Remind yourself that you can hope
for health, love, peace and prosperity
and work hard to get them.
Put your energy into looking for
another way to get your positive goals met
than through the experience that has hurt you.
Instead of mentally replaying your hurt
seek out new ways to get what you want.
Instead of focusing on your wounded feelings,
and thereby giving the person who caused you pain power over you,
learn to look for the love, beauty and kindness around you.
Forgiveness is about personal power.
Amend your grievance story to remind
you of the heroic choice
to forgive.